the greatest tragedy (part one)
the LORD God said, "it is not good for man to be alone. i will make a helper suitable for him."
Genesis 2:18
in perfection, it was not good for man to be alone. we find ourselves in a broken and fallen world, but Jesus came to redeem and restore. Scripture is Gods story of redemption. it's testimony after testimony revealing the character of our Creator. the One who was, who is, and who'll always be. we find ourselves caught up in His story. He beckons we stare at Him, stare at Jesus. to celebrate and imitate. only in Him will we find breath and life and every good thing.
marriage is a picture. it's the closet representation we have of Christ and the church, His bride. how did something so beautiful become so perverted and tainted? why does marriage bring about thoughts of heavy bonds and burden? when did it become a second rate pursuit?
our generations greatest tragedy is the destruction of marriage.
for this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
Genesis 2:24
the very air we breath is poisoned, and this shouldn't come as a surprise. we are ambassadors in a foreign land. we battle our sinful nature and the enemy. everything became fractured at the fall, beauty ruined.
so how do we redeem relationships? how do we restore the beauty of marriage?
we have to understand the purpose of marriage. we have to understand Gods intended roles for men and women.
do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—His good, pleasing and perfect will.
romans 12:2
we exist to know Him and make Him known. He is our greatest good. the purpose of marriage is to bring glory to God. isn't it funny how we've separated good from God? we constantly battle against believing that God wants to keep us from good. why can't we have sex with whomever, whenever we want? why must commitment precede our emotional and physical desires? why must men love by sacrificing, and why must women love by submitting? how often we believe that we know better than God... the Creator of the universe! if we say it aloud, it's comical. but that's exactly how we live.
we were created for relationship. when Jesus prayed before He was taken to the cross, He desired for us to be one, as He is one with the Father. (John 17:20-22) Jesus is our model for perfect relationship. God the Son (Jesus) submits to God the Father, and God the Holy Spirit submits to the Son. they're all equally God, but they each have distinct roles in the trinity. so too with us, male and female. we have equal value in the sight of God, both being created in His image, but we have distinct roles. God created us distinctly to serve the body, and these differences were given to bring Him glory.
the destruction of marriage began with the destruction of our distinct roles in relationship; the distinct roles modeled by Jesus, and laid out in scripture.
so what are our distinct roles?
God created man, and then He created women (from man) as a helpmate. He created adam, and then gave eve to adam to help adam attend to the directive God had given him. adams directive was two-fold; to govern and cultivate the earth. (Genesis 2:15) eve was given adams directive, in other words she was given to help adam accomplish his directive, she wasn't given her own. adam and eve together were given the second directive, be fruitful and multiply. neither adam or eve could accomplish these directives apart from each other. from the beginning in perfection, men and women were compliments to each other with distinct roles. (Genesis 1:28)
Jesus added one more directive after His resurrection; to be His ambassadors. (Matthew 28:16-20)
men are called to be Christs ambassadors, govern and cultivate the earth, and be fruitful and multiply. women are called to be Christs ambassadors and to help/assist a man in accomplishing His directives.
God gives each man a unique task in the overall directive in which to accomplish. women are called to one man to assist/help accomplish this task. at some point we decided we didn't like the roles God laid out for us, and began defining our roles as we pleased. we display by our words and actions that our ways are better then His. we lose sight of our distinct but equally valuable roles as men and women. lazy and idle men have relinquished their roles as leaders, and cultivators. while women have been deceived into believing that wife and mother are secondary pursuits.
our primary calling as men and women is to be Christs ambassadors, but God has given us, male and female, distinct roles to play in His story.
our primary role as men is to lead, cultivate, and multiply. women your primary role is to help/assist one man to lead, cultivate, and multiply.
for further study: Reforming Marriage by Douglas Wilson